Bullying Is In The Best Of Us

Bullying……I’m not sure what has happened in the past few years, whether it be an increase in social media users, people are more outspoken, maybe my eyes are open more than they use to be, but it seems in every direction I turn there is judgement, bullying and self-righteousness. It saddens me that a simple post of a Facebook Meme posted in the past (pictured below) supporting all parents choices can spark such a massive debate which in turn lead to judgements, bullying and insults. This behaviour I witness on a daily basis on and offline has inspired today’s blog. Why do others feel they have a right to comment on people’s lives they have never met? Where does this self-righteous behaviour stem from? What gives someone the right to have an opinion or a judgement on how people, act, dress, walk, parent etc? Strangers & Friends alike. Friends judge each other on relationships, social events, houses, children, personality, other friends. You name it. Is it competition or jealousy? I am not writing this from the view of a saint. Far from it actually. There have been times in my past where low self-esteem has stemmed into negative thoughts or jealousy of those around me. Hindsight is awesome, isn’t it!? Things as simple as taking the kids shopping puts you directly in contact with strangers who think they have been passed a gift of voicing their negative opinions onto others. I have seen people death staring us because my toddlers were singing happily in the trolley, people have said snarky insulting rude comments when my toddler was having a tantrum in the shops…..WHY?? This behaviour is nothing short of bullying. My instinct would be to smile at the mother and warmly tell her it happens to the best of us and she is doing a great job. When a person has a different parenting view, then the thought in my mind would be awesome, we all have to do what works for us and our family, not to insult and make the job of parenting even harder by living in guilt instead of leading by instinct. I follow a few Celebrities on Instagram and I am yet to see a picture posted of themselves without bullying insults on how fat, ugly, pathetic, skinny, what ever it may be but NEVER once has there been a clean set of comments. So some people go out of there way just to follow others to insult and bring them down, it absolutely boggles my mind. Charlotte Dawson’s passing is the result of this kind of behavior RIP. Imagine a world where people lifted each other up rather than tearing each other down. There have been reported cases of people in utter despair planning their suicide and the turning point being a complete stranger giving them a warm smile and asking them how they are. Positive attitudes, compassion and empathy is what we should arm ourselves with every single morning we wake up. Who cares if someone’s child has a spirited personality, if their house is bigger, if someone’s clothes are not your style if someone in the shops smells funny, religious views, ethnicity, income, spouse of choice……No really WHO CARES!!!??? These kind of examples don’t affect others in the slightest. All it does is make them a resentful negative person. Currently, in Australia there are advocates trying to pass an anti-bullying law, there are 2 I have signed petitions for called Charlotte’s Law and Chloe’s Law. I think these are a great idea but I think a lot of other avenues have to change. Bullying seems to be the end of a cycle. It’s the end of the line. The beginning of the cycle has to change, start with teaching children to think of something nice about a person rather than looking for a negative. That a simple negative comment leads to teasing and onwards to bullying. I would love to see some kind of uplifting activities started in Primary Schools, maybe a set curriculum that involves the anti-bullying education from start to finish. Try to give others a break. If you have a bad thought about someone take a step back and ask yourself why? Why is it I am seeing the negative? Why did I choose to insult that person rather than compliment them?  Every single person on this earth is different. The quicker we accept we are not clones with identical views and personalities the more accepting and kind we will be and of course the world would be a lot nicer to live in. Tell me your thoughts. I would love to know if you think this problem is reaching epidemic levels, share your experience, comment below 🙂 Melanie 

3 thoughts on “Bullying Is In The Best Of Us

  1. flanna29,

    Online media is awesome if used positively, however it can hide cyber bullies in a cloak of anonymousness where they can say anything and get away with it. Technology is possible to track these people so laws need to be changed.
    In public I think people should apply the 10 second rule. Think before you speak, hold that thought for 10 seconds and decide whether what you are about to say is negative, nonconstructive, hurtful & any of your business! In the next 10 seconds consider smiling, a nod of support or maybe “can I help you” if you see a Mum, elder etc whom might need a hand with something like grocery bags or the like.
    It is amazing how it will make you and them feel 🙂

  2. Nique,

    What has changed is simple manners. Once you might have viewed someone’s behaviour as odd, rude, irritating etc but it would have been considered tactless or rude of you to say anything unless their behaviour was directed at you. You would probably have gone home and called a girlfriend/sister/mum and gossiped or discussed it with your other half but that would have been the end of it. Even in small towns the rules of engagement were the same but the town biddy body (in my village my grandfather) would have “talked” to you about it then end of topic.

    Now people seem to find the need to voice their opinion on everything be it through direct contact or via social media. No one sees it as rude, tactless or bad manners the view seems to be that everyone has the right to an opinion what they forget is just because you have an opinion it doesn’t mean everyone wants to hear/read it.

    I don’t know about others but we were raised with the motto – if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything.

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